It is the beginning of the new year and as per Dr. Seuss in the book Oh, The Places You’ll Go!, states:
“You have brains in your head.
You have feet in your shoes.
You can steer yourself any direction you choose.”
And this is so true… Furthermore, when/if you pick some goals or objectives for the year, it is a good idea to write them down.
This is because you are significantly more likely to achieve your goals when they are written as per the attached Goals Research Summary.
In addition, making a public commitment and/or establishing a weekly progress report with someone is an additional way of increasing your odds of success at achieving your targets.
While all of the above is true, I have typically abstained from the process of making new year’s resolutions. This year, however, Chris Brogan‘s “Three Words” blogathon resonated for me. What made this year different?
Nancy Smyth and I had a talk about her “three words” from last year which started the wheels in my brain churning, so to speak…
Jacqui Barrett-Poindexter not only wrote a lovely post with her three words for 2014 but in her announcement about this on twitter, she asked me for my three words…
As a result of my recent introduction to art journaling via Brené Brown’s online course, I wanted to express myself visually… To that end, I planned to use watercolors and have fun, fully embracing my imperfection [and Brené’s “I’m enough”].
My Three Words for 2014
Daring – My plan is to work on stretching myself to do a number of things [professionally and personally] that feel a bit scary because they are new/foreign to me but I will do them anyway.
As per Linda Graham, MFT, it is quite natural that we feel anxious or scared right before we attempt to do something new. This is because our brain views these actions on our parts as “mistakes” and our dopamine levels are literally disrupted.
However, when we push through the fear and do a new desired activity, our dopamine level is restored and we teach ourselves that we may do new/never tried before activities – thereby increasing our resiliency. To this end, Linda recommends that we do one daring thing per day!
Connection – I’d like to deepen some existing relationships as well as re-establish some past connections [due to a number of family difficulties/illnesses over the past two years, there was a bit of cocooning on my part].
I am motivated to do this from a meaningfulness perspective, but this is also a step you may wish to consider from a mental health or resiliency point of view.
As per Brené Brown, connection enables you to have the necessary emotional support and strength to get through life’s inevitable ups and downs.
In addition, connection along with the courage to share your vulnerabilities [your true self] and compassion enable you to live wholeheartedly.
Self-Care – My objective here would be to improve three areas: sleep, exercise and breakfast. I’d basically like to have better routines in each of these categories.
The benefits to getting a good night’s rest keep growing daily. Two good articles on the topic are: Sleep’s Role in Obesity, Schizophrenia, Diabetes…Everything and Why You Should Sleep Your Way to the Top [it’s not what it sounds like :)].
In a nutshell, sleep is good for every part of your mental and overall health.
Exercise is also wonderful for you. Aside from feeling more energized, it can boost your Creativity and provide 20 Wonderful Effects on the Mind.
There are also several Health Benefits to eating a regular breakfast such as your tendency to feel healthier, energized, have a better memory and consume more nutrients.
It is my hope that this process of having written and visualized my goals will in fact help me to realize my three words. Practicing daring, connection and self-care, in turn would enable me to do my best on all fronts.
As Mark Victor Hansen eloquently states: “By recording your dreams and goals on paper, you set in motion the process of becoming the person you most want to be.”
What are your three words for 2014? What three words do you feel best describe you and/or your challenges and goals?
Below is Nick’s List.ly in case you’d like to share your three words there as well. I love what you’ve shared so far [in your comments below] 🙂
A wonderful new year’s post, Dorlee. I’m still working out my third word, so I will lay low until I’ve nailed that down/
Thanks so much, Nancy 🙂
I’m so grateful for our little talk. I’m excited about having these three words to think about as well as having my picture to hang up in the bedroom and see as a visual reminder…
Hi Dorlee,
I LOVE your three words and the illustrative watercolor to support them! (You and Jackie Yun have piqued my interest in bringing life to ‘my’ three words through visuals. I’ll have to cogitate on that 🙂
As well, I appreciated how you defined your words and the action steps you have planned around those words. Your three words interlace so well, and I must say, ‘daring’ is such a powerful word to lead the way.
The idea of doing one ‘daring’ thing per day to increase resiliency makes good sense. I’ve been reading lately about fear/courage and the relationship thereto, and your post further reinforces what I’m hearing. I enjoyed reading Linda Graham, MFT’s explanation as to the impact on dopamine levels when we encounter new challenges.
You/your readers might also enjoy the following post at Dawn Lennon’s (@businessfit) blog on ‘firing up your courage’ – http://bit.ly/18THHyD. Some of her insights resonated with what I’m reading here.
For example, Dawn says: “Courage and self-confidence have an odd connection. Courage generally drags self-confidence along for the ride, often kicking and screaming. Why? Because the best way to build self-confidence is to test yourself routinely, taking sensible chances that teach you to trust yourself.”
In closing, I appreciate the ‘nod’ to my tweet and post, as well – you are always so courteous that way. It sounds like you were well on your way to three words even before I tweeted. Perhaps this is an example of synchronicity!
I look forward to reading Nancy Smyth’s three words, as well.
Happy New Year, Dorlee, and all the best as you pursue action toward your three-word goals!
Jacqui
Great post to start the year Dorlee! I applaud your decision to write down your goals (a blog is the perfect place!). As for my three words… hmm, good question. I will start with… Grace, Courage, and Consistency.
Thank you, Jacqui, for your enthusiastic support for my three words and I love how you are now tempted to create a visual representation of your three words. You had mentioned how my art journaling post was inspiring a desire to watercolor; perhaps now is the time to take out those brushes?
Also, thank you for sharing Dawn Lennon’s post on “firing up your courage.” It is most apropos for tackling new/unknown challenges!
As for the timing, if you’re seeking precision, it was a combination of both synchronicity and your inspiration. I had my three words in hand, so to speak, prior to your tweet; however, your tweet gave me the gentle nudge I needed to put my thoughts down in writing/visual form. So I am most grateful to both you and Nancy… because I found this whole process both enjoyable and meaningful.
Wishing you a successful year as you work towards your three wonderful words of build, unwind and focus,
Dorlee
Thanks so much, Brent, for your kind feedback.
I love the three words that you selected for 2014: Grace, Courage and Consistency. They seem most fitting for you and the type of inspiring and supportive leadership you provide via social media.
Hello Dorlee,
What a cool way to express your three words!
My three words are:
Flowers – Encouragement to do what’s important with grace and beauty because life is fleetingly short.
Heart – Reminder to live from the heart because the heart can be an equal partner with the head, even in seemingly mind-dominated situations.
Enrich- A daily ask: Am I enriching others by my actions? Am I enriching myself?
I’d also like to share this from Ellen Goodman: “We spend January 1 walking through our lives, room by room, drawing up a list of work to be done, cracks to be patched. Maybe this year, to balance the list, we ought to walk through the rooms of our lives… not looking for flaws, but for potential.”
Here’s to our potential in 2014 and the unfolding of who we will “be”!!
Jackie Yun
Hi Jackie,
Thank you. I love the three words you selected: Flowers, Heart and Enrich.
As I read over your descriptions, I feel like what you’re really saying is that you want to make sure that what you’re doing at all time is what matters and is congruent with your values. Beautiful.
I also love your quote from Ellen Goodman and the idea of our focusing our time/attention on our potential for 2014 – Cheers to that !
Beautiful, as always, and useful (as always)! Thank you, Dorlee, for sharing the post, your three words, and for always giving us the what, the how, the why, and the research/sources for further exploration. You have a gift for combining the science behind what you share with easy to hear (and implement) stories people can embrace and use. Loved your artwork, too!
Thank you so much, Shahrzad, for your very kind and detailed feedback!
You’ve totally captured what I try to do in my posts and you’ve done it so eloquently… I’m most grateful.
Warm regards,
Dorlee
Hi Dorlee,
An inspiring post to start the new year! I admire your daring in sharing your watercolor with us. I particularly like the butterfly and the heart encircled by the phone. I love the challenge to think of my own words for the year. So… my three words for 2014 are Balance, Self-discipline and Lovingkindness. Stay tuned for more about that in my new blog.
Warmly,
Andrea
Hi Andrea,
Thank you. I’m so glad that you found this post inspiring 🙂
Re the watercolor, I hadn’t really thought about it but you’re right that it took some courage to share it and it is not something that I would have done even just 2 years ago. Thank you so much for pointing this out… this means that without even being aware of it, I have started to do more daring things. As per the neuroscientists, I can almost feel the hormones/my brain taking in this positive information/result and it meaning I can tackle the next thing on my list.
I’m glad you liked my butterfly. The butterfly was/is important to me… because I need/want the courage to tackle the next items on my agenda; hence I made it rather large and put it front and center.
And the heart with the phone… I was trying to convey how I love connecting on a deep level; it warms my heart 🙂
I love the three words you chose for this year: Balance, Self-Discipline and Lovingkindness! A life full of these three goals is apt to be quite successful because while you are working towards your mission(s), you are taking care of yourself and being self-compassionate. It sounds like a win-win to me.
Wishing you much success on your 2014 endeavors and I look forward to reading all about them on your new blog!
Warmly,
Dorlee
Dear Dorlee,
Your three words certainly resonate with me. I’ll explain how:
Daring – I love how you used the word “stretching”, which fits nicely with exercise, by the way! 🙂 Perhaps fear is the under-current of why someone doesn’t do something, or perhaps it could be related to a number of other factors – time, money, inertia, uncertainty.
Anyway, your first word adds punctuation to something I chose to do on New Year’s Eve, thanks to a Daily Deal that caught my eye. In a post on ART (http://rheumfuloftips.wordpress.com/2013/07/26/471-hollywood-calling/) I wrote about a yearning of wanting to do some acting – not so much to be on stage, but just to stretch myself – to see if I could do it. Well, I signed up for an acting class. So, it looks like we’ll be stretching together. What is your first act of daring, Dorlee?
Connection – I’m glad that you’ve moved out of the cocoon stage; it’s interesting how some of us naturally do that in order to recharge. Like electrical wire that is frayed, perhaps some of our connections are not able to provide the charge (support) that we want/need?
Self-Care – This one is high on my list; they are part of my overall plan to live as well as I do. I applaud your three challenges. They’re so important. Period. 🙂
Seems like you are learning, changing and growing (my three words). To quote Martha Stewart – “That’s a good thing.” 🙂
Dear Marianna,
Thank you for sharing how beautifully my three words resonate with you. I am totally blown away by just how well they fit!
First on Daring – I love how you dared to sign up for your acting class and you know that dare is not over because each time you attend class and act, you will be repeatedly doing something courageous:) That’s terrific!
Connection – this can mean and be different things to different people… in my particular case, I am simply looking forward to both deepening my connection with a few online friends such as my #summitfriends who have been there for me during my cocooning stage as well as reaching out and re-establishing a connection with some important offline friends and colleagues.
Self-care – very important but despite all my great reasons as to why…I’m still finding myself struggling with these. I think I may have to cut back on some of my social media activities for example for me to have any success with accomplishing the sleep goal 🙁 There are trade-offs to everything in life…
Yes, your three words: learning, changing and growing totally apply for me as well 🙂
May you accomplish all that you set out to achieve in 2014!
Dear Dorlee,
Thanks for sharing more about what your watercolor symbolizes for you. I’m glad I was able to help you notice that you were already being daring.
I admire the way you share about your own inner process and view that as daring as well. Your willingness to be vulnerable in that way is part of what has inspired me to be more revealing about my own process in my new blog. The first post is hot off the presses. I would value your feedback.
warmly,
Andrea
Dear Andrea,
Thank you for sharing. I’m very touched that my writing has influenced you in that way.
I will definitely check out your new blog and your first post later this evening 🙂
Warmly,
Dorlee
As a teacher I am a firm believer in the dictum that you never know what kids are capable of until you ask them to do more than they are able to. We should apply this to ourselves as well. Dare to do more than you think you can. You’ll either surprise yourself and find that you actually can do it, or at the least you’ll set a new and wider boundary for yourself.
Thank you, Steve – I most appreciate your inspiring and encouraging message!
I intend to write down your words: “Dare to do more than you think you can. You’ll either surprise yourself and find that you actually can do it, or at the least you’ll set a new and wider boundary for yourself” to further support my butterfly image and my intentions this year.